Friday, June 15, 2012

Things That Make Me Happy -- #4: Stargazing

Every Friday I'll be posting about one thing that makes me happy in order to complete goal #82: Identify 100 things that make me happy.

Today's topic is: Stargazing

(WALL-E ©Disney/Pixar)

When I was a kid I wanted to be an astronaut. True, I also wanted to be a firefighter, a teacher, a cop, a secretary, a paleontologist, an ice skater, and Alexi Lalas. But nothing has kept me as fascinated or as in awe as the stars have. Some of my happiest moments have been spent looking up at the night sky, wondering at the beauty of the universe and marveling at the awesomeness of science.

My grandfather took my sister and I to go look at Hale-Bopp in '97 and I can remember being ridiculously excited as I peered through the binoculars at the trail of the comet. Much later, when I was in college, he and I went deep into the country and pulled over to the side of the road to try and catch a meteor shower. Even though we didn't see any meteors, the sheer magnitude of stars in the sky was breathtaking.

It isn't just stars or comets that fueled my passion for looking at the sky. In high school my family took my friend Kristy to Beaver Meadow's observatory so that we could all use a telescope to see Saturn and Uranus. It's humbling to know that there are objects orbiting around our sun that are so large that your own puny planet could fit inside of them...several times.

The universe is staggering and staggeringly beautiful. Wherever I am, whether it's in the middle of a light-polluted city or standing in a field in the middle of nowhere, I like to look up at the stars and see how many I can find/identify. It's a peaceful sort of feeling and an exciting one. I don't need a religion or any other outdated mode of explaining the world to appreciate what I'm seeing. I think it's even more impressive that the universe had no creator and that natural, scientific processes are responsible for the beauty around us.
________________

Woah, one full week of posts. Can I do it again next week? Only time will tell. :)

-J

Thursday, June 14, 2012

Weight Loss Goal: Lose 20 lbs by August

I'm overweight. Obese, actually. I weight around 220 lbs when I should weigh somewhere around 120 lbs. Honestly that seems a little low even though I'm under 5 feet tall. My eventual goal weight is the same as it's been for a long time: 135 lbs. But I'm going to do it in steps.

Right now the plan is to try to lose in 20 lb increments. I'm giving myself until August to lose the first 20. It's doable and I'm not going to use any fad diets or anything like that to do it. Instead, I'm making lifestyle changes. I'm cutting out fast food. I'm going to eat 3 meals a day instead of 1 or 2. I'm going to start exercising. And I'm even going to quit smoking.

My weight has been an issue since I was in middle school. In fifth grade I was a skinny twig of a thing and then sixth grade rolled around and I started gaining. Some of that was puberty, but some of it was the fact that I was being bullied a lot and I started to eat my feelings. That trend would continue for a long time. I don't know what my heaviest weight was, but I'm guessing it was somewhere around 230. Then college came.

I didn't gain the "freshman 15". In fact, I lost about 20 lbs my first year of college. I attribute it to not snacking and being more active. I was walking to and from class. I didn't have a car, so I was walking to get places. I lost even more the summer before my junior year because I was working a really active job where I was on my feet for seven hours at a time. I didn't look amazing or anything (I was still hovering around 190), but it felt good to see a number below 200. But the job went away, my habits changed, and the weight came back.

And it's stayed there ever since. I stopped walking as much as I used to when I got a car. I haven't been snacking or anything, but I have been eating LOTS of fast food, drinking sugary beverages, and being idle for most of the day. I'm actually surprised that I haven't been gaining weight, but that may be attributable to the fact that I smoke, I live on the third floor of a building with no elevator, and I'm trudging up and down the stairs for a cigarette once every hour or so.

Regardless, I'm making changes now that I'm hoping will have a positive impact on my life. I've eaten breakfast for the last three days (yogurt and granola or a bowl of cereal and a banana), my lunches have been healthy, and I haven't been eating out at all this week (except for Tuesday, but there's a long story as to why). Don and I have been making dinner at home all week and have already planned out our grocery list for next week. We're going to start getting up at 5 am next week so that we can get an hour of exercise in before showering/eating breakfast/preparing lunch/going to work. And the last cigarette I will (hopefully) ever smoke will be crushed under my shoe on Sunday night.

I may try this and fail. I may slide back into bad habits. But it takes 21 days to break a bad habit and I'm hoping that the same is true for starting new, healthy habits. I have Don to kick me in the ass if I start straying back off the path to healthy me and I have this blog to help keep me honest about how I'm doing.

Hopefully by August I'll be 20 lbs thinner and well on the way to becoming something new and better.

-J

Wednesday, June 13, 2012

Spotlight on Day Zero: Goal #45 -- Learn How to Read Tarot Cards







Every other Wednesday I'll be writing a post about one of my uncompleted goals for the Day Zero Project. Today's goal is:

#45: Learn how to read tarot cards

From How Stuff Works

I identified as Pagan on and off for about six years before I realized that religion as a whole just wasn't for me. I don't miss those days, especially because it never really made me feel, well, anything. Except for stupid. There were loads of times that I felt stupid. The one thing I regret, however, is that I never learned how to read tarot cards.

I don't believe in fortune telling or mysticism or anything like that. I just think it's kind of a useful skill to have. Need a little extra cash? Offer to do readings for people. Does your child's school need volunteers for a fair of some sort? Tell them you'll play the fortune teller. Besides, I have a deck that's never really been used and I'd feel bad just giving it away without at least trying to get something out of it first.

Like several of the other goals on my list, this one is just for fun. It's something I can do when I'm bored and if, as some people suggest, tarot is a way to tap into your subconscious (like a Rorschach test), maybe it'll even be helpful in growing as a person.

-J

Tuesday, June 12, 2012

I Stand with the Sisters

Show your support with a button. Get them here.

I recently wrote a post that talked a little bit about my atheism, which is something that is extremely important to me. I have also, however, written an awful lot about women's rights and other social issues that are equally as important. That's why I'm choosing to highlight an important fight happening here in the United States.

I Stand With the Sisters arose as a response to the Vatican's condemnation and discipline of American nuns for choosing to focus on such crazy things as helping the poor and feeding the hungry rather than on things the Vatican sees as important--like standing against abortion or same-sex marriage. It's a grassroots movement designed to raise awareness of the Vatican's ridiculous decision to punish nuns who don't fall in line, as well as a show of support for nuns who are concentrating on making the world a better place rather than trying to make it a more divided one.

I've known four nuns in my lifetime. Yes, I know that's neither a statistically significant amount nor can their actions be used to make broad generalizations about all nuns. That having been said, all four of them have been kind-hearted, open-minded, and dedicated to doing good in the world. I once heard one of them say to a roomful of people at a dinner celebrating the LGBT community: "I'm sick and tired of seeing a 2,000-year-old book used as a way to discriminate against people and take away their rights." This woman is about eighty years old and has had my admiration since.

And she isn't the only one. As NPR reported in May:
The Second Vatican Council, popularly known as Vatican II, had asked religious orders to modernize, which for many nuns meant focusing more on social justice and other issues in their communities and less on promulgating church doctrine — including Rome's strict views on birth control and abortion. 
So, the problem seems to be that while nuns have been moving forward, the rest of the Catholic hierarchy hasn't been. There is also the matter of the Vatican prizing doctrine over people. Sister Simone Campbell told NPR's Melissa Block:
...what we do as women religious is, we minister to people everywhere who are suffering, who are being discriminated against, and we don't ask to see a baptismal certificate. We serve everyone we find, in keeping with the Gospel of Jesus. That's what we're doing.
The bishops have a different mandate and a different message. And they are trying to protect the institution and to worry mostly - apparently - about an orthodoxy that I can't quite understand. But our different missions still - serves one faith.
I have to say that I've seen nuns as being allies for a long time. They are about empowering women, aiding the poor, educating themselves and other people, and generally being awesome. In the wake of this new crisis, I feel the need to be their ally as well. We may not hold the same beliefs about the nature of the world, its creation, or whether or not there's a supernatural being behind it all, but we do stand on the same side of the social divide that has been tearing this country asunder for over a decade.

Please, please, please, regardless of your faith or lack thereof, pledge to stand with the sisters. Like their Facebook page in order to keep up with news about their fight. Visit the website to educate yourself more on the issues at stake. Write letters/call people/put up flyers to help spread the message as well as to voice your opinions on the matter. Pray (if that's what you do/what you think will help). If you're a priest or a man of faith, stand in solidarity with these women. If you're a woman of faith, press your religious community to be more open to women in positions of power within various denominations of whatever religion you follow. If you're an atheist, as I am, do not let your disbelief in god stand in the way of supporting women who are trying to make the world a better place. Stop letting the Vatican condemn women as feminists (as if that was a bad thing) simply because they don't agree with them.

One other thing that I suggest doing, if you haven't already, is to help one nun climb her way even further up the best-seller list. Apparently after the Vatican threw a hissy fit over Sister Margaret Farley's book Just Love: A Framework for Christian Sexual Ethics it soared up to #16, although it has since dropped down to #26. Whether or not Sister Margaret is actually hoping to make it even closer to the top is actually irrelevant. Showing the Vatican that just because they say something doesn't mean everyone is going to jump to obey is a big step towards change.

I stand with the sisters. Do you?

-J

Monday, June 11, 2012

Proof of How Far We've Come

Photo taken from LA Progressive

I was forced out of the closet my freshman year of high school. At the turn of the 21st century, being LGBT was still seen by the vast majority of people to be wrong/sinful/gross, etc. So when somehow someone discovered that I was bisexual (to this day I'm not sure how this girl found out), she wasted no time in telling anyone who would listen. This led to several years of ridicule, mocking, bullying, etc...on top of all of the shit that I was already getting for not being popular/pretty/skinny/whatever else teenagers seem to think is unworthy.

It really wasn't until college that I felt fully accepted and loved for who I was. I lost friends in high school because of my sexuality, but in college I gained respect for being proud and open and I gained friends through my work with my college's GSA as well as other diversity clubs on campus. Today I am even prouder and more open than ever before. Some of this has to do with maturing, with living in a supportive environment during college, and with the fact that society has become more tolerant than ever before. Some of it also has to do with the initiatives around the country fighting for gay rights, the passage of marriage equality in New York State (and elsewhere), and the courage others around me (especially my trans-identified friends and acquaintances) have shown in the last several years.

I came across an interesting story on Dan Savage's blog last week that I wanted to share on this Monday morning. A high school in a traditionally conservative county in California named the only openly lesbian couple in their school to be "Cutest Couple" in their yearbook. I think that this is not only a demonstration of how far the LGBT community has come in just the last decade or so, it is also clear evidence of what several polls have found: namely, that younger people are more likely to be supportive of gay marriage.

A NY Times/CBS poll finds that it is still young people and those on the political left who are more likely to show moderate to strong support of same-sex marriage. The fact that this high school nominated a lesbian couple to be "Cutest Couple" doesn't surprise me, although it does give me hope. What would surprise me is if the older generations would finally move away from their homophobic "traditional marriage is sacred" bullshit and start learning acceptance from the younger generations.

I do feel as if same-sex marriage will one day be legalized on a national level, although it may take a long time for that to happen. Interracial marriage was once just as big of an issue (if not a bigger issue) than gay marriage and look at what happened there. I'm proud of this school and its students and I look forward, just like Dan Savage does, "to the day when stories like this don't shock us because 'values'—conservative or otherwise—is no longer synonymous with 'anti-gay.'"

I'd like to end by saying that in no way do I think that every student in that school supports this couple, nor am I saying that those who did vote for them are also automatically supporters of gay marriage. But I will say that these students now know an openly gay couple and have grown to know them over four years. One of the biggest indicators of whether or not someone will be supportive of a minority group and its rights is whether or not someone knows a member of that minority group. This is true for people in the LGBT community, as well as for other groups, like Muslims. Neil Patel and Pragya Kakani state that:
Improved knowledge of Islam and contact with Muslims, it stands to reason, could help ease tensions. According to a 2006 Gallup poll, most Americans do not know any Muslims personally. The same poll found that almost one in four Americans say they would not want a Muslim as a neighbor, and one in three would be nervous if they noticed a Muslim man boarding their flight. Personally knowing a Muslim, however, significantly correlates with a more favorable perception. [emphasis added]
Similarly, Lymari Morales says that:
Views of gay marriage are strongly related to ideology. But the increase in support among those who personally know someone who is gay or lesbian is not merely a reflection of the fact that liberals are more likely to know someone of same-sex orientation. Further analysis reveals that, when controlling for ideology, those who know someone who is gay or lesbian are significantly more supportive of gay marriage than are those of the same political persuasion who do not personally know someone who is gay or lesbian.
Basically what I'm trying to say is that as long as the LGBT community (or Muslims; or atheists; or liberals; or whatver) is visible, as long as we're introducing ourselves to people and building friendships and living by example and showing that we're not what everyone believes us to be, we will be more likely to be supported by those around us than if we were to hide who we are.

We've come a long way, but, as polls continue to show, we have a long way to go still. These two girls should be applauded for their courage and their strength and their schoolmates should be applauded for their support. 

Hats off to you, Calaveras High School!

-J

Friday, June 8, 2012

Things That Make Me Happy -- #3: Thunderstorms

Every Friday I'll be posting about one thing that makes me happy in order to complete goal #82: Identify 100 things that make me happy.

Today's topic is: Thunderstorms


Okay, first, I had no idea how hard it was going to be to find a video of a thunderstorm. There are a lot out there but none of them are very good. So the video above is of a virtual thunderstorm. Which is a bit lame, but beggars can't be choosers.

I've had an obsession with thunderstorms ever since I was a child. I love all of it--the lightning, the thunder, the wind, the rain. There's just something inherently powerful and alluring about them. I remember nights when my grandmother and I would sit in the living room and watch storms out the window. I remember sitting on the covered porch in my old dorm, listening to the rain pound on the pavement as the wind whipped through the trees.

I can't say that I'm a fan of driving in them, but I can never resist the urge to sit at home and watch them. On my birthday last month, there was a huge thunderstorm in the Rochester area, with torrential downpours and lots of lightning to boot. Don and I watched primarily out of the window, but (being a little bit nuts) I spent a few minutes outside standing in the rain, feeling the wind rush around me. There's nothing quite like that feeling.

Also, if you're ever looking for a good song to listen to during a thunderstorm, I've definitely got a recommendation:


E Nomine's "Mitternacht" goes really well with creepy, stormy nights. Don't believe me? Find the thunderstorm sound clip of your choice and play this at the same time. Fan-freaking-tastic.

-J

Thursday, June 7, 2012

I'm Being a Bookworm

Okay, so I know that my posts have been kind of sporadic. Sorry about that. I really do want to update this blog five times a week. I'll try harder. Honest.

In the meantime, I've been a bookworm lately. Reading is one of those things that make me happy, especially when it's an actual book with actual pages. I get that everyone and their uncle has an e-reader but I don't and I don't intend to ever own one (although I'll admit to using my boyfriend's from time to time).

In the last week or so I've been on a non-fiction binge. Specifically books on atheism. I'm an unapologetic and very vocal atheist but for some reason I've never read any books by atheist writers. I read one recently by Greta Christina called Why Are You Atheists So Angry? 99 Things That Piss Off the Godless, which got me wanting to read others. Earlier this week I read God Is Not Great: How Religion Poisons Everything by the late Christopher Hitchens and I just finished Faith No More: Why People Reject Religion by Phil Zuckerman. I have a few others that I'm planning to read before I move onto a different topic.

These books have only strengthened my own personal convictions. I've tried religion before. I was a Christian growing up, although I left after I just couldn't handle the religion's beliefs about homosexuality (which was the straw that broke the camel's back, really; there are about a million other reasons why I left). My second apostasy came after a short and laughable stint as a Pagan. I've read about other religions, learned about their tenets. But nothing fit. For me, it really comes down to what to what I believe to be the truth: there is no god. It doesn't matter how many people believe in one; that doesn't make it true.

I'm going to try to review the books that I read while I'm doing the Day Zero Project, although I've got some catching up to do as I've already read a few books. We'll see how that goes.

-J

Monday, June 4, 2012

Completed Goal -- #26: Find a New Hobby

I recently completed another goal for the Day Zero Project:

#26: Find a new hobby


My boyfriend, Don, and I got insanely bored a week or so ago and decided to stop down at Millennium Games to pick up a few starter decks for Magic: The Gathering. He had once had an extensive collection of cards but had sold them long before meeting me. I had only played once or twice in high school, but he and I were both looking for something that the two of us could do when we were mind-numbingly bored and no one else was around. Magic seemed to fit the bill.

Being the nerds that we are, we enjoy the fact that we can spend time together AND geek out at the same time. One of the things that I appreciate most about him (and I know the same is true for him) is that I can be myself around him without being judged. In fact, sometimes I think we try to out-nerd each other.

As with any hobby or activity, it's about moderation. I'm not going to go out and spend hundreds of dollars on cards, nor are he and I going to spend thousands of hours playing. It's just something fun and relatively inexpensive (as opposed to, say, bungee jumping every weekend or starting a collection of Faberge eggs) that we can do together.

So, two goals down, 99 to go.

-J

Tuesday, May 29, 2012

I'm Back

My hiatus was a bit longer than I had expected it to be, but I'm back now and will be posting regularly starting tomorrow.

Earlier this month I wrote a post linking to a video called "Republicans, Get in My Vagina!" Now, I present to you: "How to Sponsor a Uterus."


Sorry, ladies, you must be a male to sponsor.

-J

Tuesday, May 22, 2012

No Posts This Week

You may have noticed that there was no post yesterday or this morning. That's because I was without my computer this weekend and forgot to schedule posts ahead of time.

For various and sundry (boring) reasons, I'm taking a mini blogging vacation this week.

Check back here next Monday for resumed posting.

-J

Friday, May 18, 2012

Things That Make Me Happy -- #2: Car Karaoke

Every Friday I'll be posting about one thing that makes me happy in order to complete goal #82: Identify 100 things that make me happy.

Today's topic is: Car karaoke

I've been singing since I was a toddler. Apparently my mother once walked into the room to find me in my playpen rocking out to "Do Wah Diddy." I haven't stopped rocking since. Music is a huge part of my life (in addition to singing in playpens I also play the viola) and never fails to make me feel better--no matter how much my day has sucked. Nowhere is this more the case than in my car. When I'm out driving somewhere (or, even, just aimlessly wandering back roads in order to de-stress), I'm either doing one of two things: listening to NPR or blasting music and singing my head off.

If you ever pass me on the road you're likely to hear one of these songs blaring from my open window as I sing along:

1) "Allo Paris" by Mano Solo (Yes, I can sing/speak French.)

2) "Bohemian Rhapsody" by Queen

3) "Demon Kitty Rag" by Katzenjammer

4) "Henrietta" by The Fratellis

5) "Dilli DĂĽdĂĽk" by Tarkan (And I can sing in Turkish. I just wish I could speak it.)

-J

Thursday, May 17, 2012

I'm On a Mission

They're showing my apartment on Saturday. I've lived here for almost three years and I'm not the least bit sad to be leaving. When I first moved in it was with two girls that I barely knew and then after they moved out I asked my mother and sister (who were looking to move back to New York) to move in with me. Big mistake. Huge. Gigantic. All of it, actually. Neither roommate situation in this apartment was ideal and both of them caused a lot more stress than I cared to deal with. So now that it'll all be over in a few months, I'm able to start seeing a light at the end of the tunnel.

That doesn't mean that I'm okay with them showing the apartment on Saturday. Ever since I wrote this post about my goal to get rid of all my unnecessary junk, I've been knee-deep in going through boxes. While I've managed to throw out a good deal of stuff, I'm nowhere near finished and my room kind of resembles the aftermath of a tornado at the moment.

Not pictured: my room. Via Meteorology News.

So for the next two days I am on a mission. No, it's not to get everything cleaned up and packed. That would be ridiculous. I'm on a mission to clean my room like a seven-year-old. That's right, folks--I'm going to shove everything out of the way to give the appearance that my room is clean.

To be honest, I'll probably do more tomorrow than today because I have work later on this afternoon, but every seven-year-old knows that the key to making it look like you've cleaned your room is to put everything under the bed and in the closet. Shouldn't take too long, right?

Wish me luck!

-J

Wednesday, May 16, 2012

Completed Goal -- #85: Clean Out My E-mail Inboxes

Yesterday I completed one goal on my Day Zero list:

#85: Clean out my e-mail inboxes

I had two that I specifically wanted to clean out--my work e-mail and my personal e-mail. The personal e-mail took all of about twenty seconds. My work e-mail, however, took me a good hour or so. I had about 5,500 unread e-mails (not to mention the gazillion e-mails that I had read but never deleted) to contend with. In fact, I hadn't cleaned that inbox out since the fall of 2010! But now it's a clean slate with nothing in it and it feels so nice. If I can keep it that way it'll be a miracle, but at least it's empty for the present moment.

This also means that I can put $10 in savings for completing a task. When I have $10, that is. Or, you know, a place in which to save it.

-J

Tuesday, May 15, 2012

What Are Friends For?

Shameless plugs, of course. And here is my shameless plug:

Go check out Running Between the Raindrops. It's the personal/Day Zero blog for my greatest and most accomplished friend in the world. Seriously, she's funny, insightful, ridiculously intelligent, and deserves a lot more readers than she currently has. (Although, don't we all?)

-J

Monday, May 14, 2012

Epic Tea Time with Alan Rickman

It's official: I can watch Alan Rickman do pretty much anything and still find it compelling and sexy. Here's the gorgeous and talented Mr. Rickman drinking tea. In slow motion. To music from Inception. And then getting angry.


You get all the awards, Alan Rickman. Well, except for the Darwin Award. We'll give that to someone who isn't brilliant.

-J

Friday, May 11, 2012

Things That Make Me Happy -- #1: British Comedy

Every Friday I'll be posting about one thing that makes me happy in order to complete goal #82: Identify 100 things that make me happy.

Today's topic is: British comedy

Via markandrewholmes.com

Growing up, I was a big PBS kid. In addition to Sesame Street, Where in the World Is Carmen Sandiego?, and Reading Rainbow, I also used to watch Britcoms with my grandparents. Ever since then I've preferred them over American television shows. The humor is better, the social commentary is more biting and prescient, and the shows are of a higher quality all around. Today, nothing makes me laugh harder or make me feel better than a good Britcom. Here are a few of my favorites (in no particular order):

1) As Time Goes By
Via BBC
As Time Goes By follows the story of Jean (the ever-fabulous Judi Dench) and Lionel (Geoffrey Palmer), former lovers who reunite decades after they first met. A funny, romantic, and brilliant love story, I grew up watching this with my grandparents. The humor is a huge selling point, but it's really the characters and their interactions that made this one of my favorite Britcoms. Jean and Lionel are really sweet together and the working relationship between the somewhat-uptight Lionel and the mildly-annoying-but-eager-to-please Alistair is hilarious.

2) Monty Python's Flying Circus
Via Wikipedia
I discovered Monty Python my freshman year of high school, but it wasn't until college that I actually watched Flying Circus. While the fourth season is, frankly, awful, the first three seasons of this show are incredible. Whether they're learning how to defend themselves against fresh fruit, having an argument, or just taking a walk, Monty Python's humor is smart, surreal, and, often, sexy (nudge, nudge, wink, wink).





3) Black Books
Via Channel 4
This show is actually brand-spanking new to me. As in, I discovered it earlier this week. Black Books follows the strange day-to-day adventures of Bernard Black (Dylan Moran), a misanthropic drunk of bookseller; his hapless shop assistant, Manny (Bill Bailey); and their friend Fran (Tamsin Greig), a woman who can hold her liquor about as well as she can hold onto a man (sorry, love, but it's true). The show is hysterical, which is all thanks to snappy dialogue, an ingenious cast, and the wacky situations that the brilliant writers (Moran among them) put these strangely lovable characters into.

4) Waiting for God
Via GPB
Tom (Graham Crowden), who often seems a few sausages short of an English breakfast, and Diana (Stephanie Cole), who hates everything and everyone, are living in a retirement village run by a complete nincompoop and his too-cheerful assistant. The two form an odd friendship/romantic relationship that allows them to survive the absurdity of life while they wait for the end of it all. Insanely funny and featuring two of the greatest characters ever to suffer inside an old folks' home, Waiting for God is one of those shows that makes you wish American television would realize that actors don't need to be young and "hip" to bring in an audience.

5) Russell Howard's Good News
Via Funri
I know there are going to be people out there who are thinking, "Wait, really? There are way better topical news shows out there." My response is, "Yeah, don't care. I love this guy." Known to many as a former panelist on Mock the Week (which is also one of my favorites, but I'm limiting myself to five), Russell Howard's very own show on the telly combines his childish humor with news of the week and internet clips. Why I find this to be an effective way to run a show is beyond me, but I think it's hilarious. I think a huge part of it is that he points out the genuine stupidity of the human race while still reminding us that there are great people out there doing amazing things (the "Mystery Guest" and "It's Not All Doom and Gloom" segments of his show). Plus, and I feel really shallow saying this, I can't help but think he's the most ridiculously adorable thing in the world.


What are some of your favorite Britcoms? Share them in the comments section.

-J

Thursday, May 10, 2012

Stay Classy, Fox News

Via Original Skrip
I have a hard time taking Faux Fox News seriously even on their best days, but sometimes they do things that drop them even lower in my estimation, which is saying quite a lot.

A recent paper in Current Biology has compared the methane production of modern cows with the projected methane production of ancient sauropods to look at just how much these massive dinosaurs may have contributed to the warmer climate of the Mesozoic. For anyone who's not sure what that sentence means, it's basically saying that flatulence on the part of dinosaurs may have been a factor in the climate of that age. Notice that I said "may have been." This paper is not stating that as a fact, merely reporting that it may have been a possibility.

So, what does this have to do with Fox? The headline for their article on this paper reads as follows: "Dinosaurs 'gassed' themselves into extinction, British scientists say." If that wasn't enough of a gem, here's the first line of the article:
Dinosaurs may have farted themselves to extinction, according to a new study from British scientists.
Okay, there is so much wrong with this. First, if they had actually read the paper (or even the summary of the paper), they would have seen that this is not an article about extinction. In fact, the only mention of extinction comes at the end of the paper and it's not even about dinosaurs:
Although dinosaurs are unique in the large body sizes they achieved, there may have been other occasions in the past where animal-produced methane contributed substantially to global environmental gas composition: for example, it has been speculated that the extinction of megafauna coincident with human colonisation of the Americas may be related to a reduction of atmospheric methane levels.
The second issue I have with this article is the absolute classlessness of it all. Apparently bathroom humor is seen as journalism at Fox. Where I come from, farts are funny, but they aren't exactly what I want to read about in my news. Thirdly, the writer of this article seems to assume that the issue of the cause of the extinction of the dinosaurs is now solved, as he states that:
Until now, an asteroid strike and volcanic activity around 65 million years ago had seemed the most likely cause of their extinction.
"Until now?" One paper gets written about dinosaur farts and automatically you think that that overthrows a few dozen years of research that has already developed a plausible explanation (i.e., that dinosaurs were wiped out by an asteroid)? Seriously?

All these researchers were trying to say is that there is possible evidence that one of the reasons why the globe was so warm was because of methane produced by dinosaurs. There's nothing in the paper to assert that dinosaurs were killed by flatulence, which doesn't seem to have stopped Fox from publishing an article that blatantly states that. Of course, only last month they were saying that it was egg-laying that caused them to die out. What'll be next month, Fox? Dinosaurs were getting too many abortions? Gay dinosaurs destroyed the sanctity of heterosexual dinosaurs' mating rituals?

Here's a good rebuttal to Fox's stupidity from io9: "No, Fox News, dinosaurs did not fart their way to extinction."

Also, just because I can't resist it:

Via Hide Your Arms
-J

Wednesday, May 9, 2012

Spotlight on Day Zero: Goal #76 -- Get rid of all the stuff I don't need







Every other Wednesday I'll be writing a post about one of my uncompleted goals for the Day Zero Project. Today's goal is:

#76: Get rid of all the stuff I don't need

In the last two and a half decades I have managed to accumulate a lot of crap. Books, clothes, mementos, knick-knacks, materials for hobbies, furniture--you get the idea. For the last seven years, I've been able to keep most of that stuff stored at my grandparents' house, which meant that the amount of stuff I had in my dorm room or apartment was only mildly horrific. Now that my grandmother and grandfather are, sadly, both gone, all of those boxes and bins are currently residing in one half of my room. The other half is covered with piles of clothes and clutter.

Now, I'm an inherently lazy person. And a huge procrastinator. I've been wanting to get rid of all of this junk for ages and yet it's still here, mocking me. With my lease up at the end of July and the three of us moving into separate places, I've only got a few months in which to declutter everything, leaving only the bare essentials and a few things that I couldn't live without.

The momentous task before me is not insurmountable but it feels pretty damn close. If I wanted the entire internet to judge me I'd post pictures of all of the things that have taken over my life because it would drive home the fact that there are department stores that have less items than I do. I know that I just need to get going and do it, but how do you decide what's worthy of keeping and what isn't? Are the playbills from shows that I've been involved in any less important than my high school yearbooks? Which books should be kept and which should be donated? And what about all of the things that have been given to me over the years? How do I decide which gifts are worthy of a place in my life and which ones aren't?


A few months ago I read a book called The Joy of Less: A Minimalist Living Guide by Francine Jay. You'll notice that it's also listed as my current read on GoodReads. The book, which explains "how to declutter, organize, and simplify your life," caught my eye when it first came into the library where I work. I'm not one for self-help books or Feng Shui or any of that. I was just looking for a little push in the right direction towards getting all of that junk out of my apartment. The book is a straightforward read that attempts to cultivate a minimalist mindset while giving you tips on what to keep, what to store, what to donate, and what to throw out. I'm rereading it now because my goal is to have #76 completed by the end of June and it wouldn't hurt to go over what Jay suggests again.

In addition to Jay's book, I've also been looking online for articles about getting rid of crap you don't need and I came across an article from UpgradeReality: "Lessons from Tyler Durden & Ben Stiller--Stop Your Possessions From Owning You." I'm a huge fan of Fight Club (both the book and the movie) and I find Durden's perspective on "stuff" to be refreshing (even if I don't agree with his methods for ridding you of your possessions). We really aren't what we own, especially since I don't even use most of what I own. Attributing importance to a pair of pants or a keyring or a desk is ludicrous.

Courtesy of best-movie-quotes

Even more importantly, though, is the fact that I want to move across the country sometime in the next year. With the amount of stuff that I have right now, I'd need a cargo plane to shift it all out west. By culling my possessions, I can ensure that I'm mobile. And, using methods discussed in Jay's book, I can make sure that I don't ever end up having too much junk ever again.

Of course, reading about getting rid of my stuff and actually getting rid of my stuff are two different things. That's why I've made it one of my Day Zero goals. Hopefully by this time in July I can sincerely say that I've lightened the burden of my possessions and can check that goal off of my list.

-J
 

Tuesday, May 8, 2012

On Vaginas, Amendments, and the GOP

While reading through Dan Savage's blog yesterday, I came across this post: "What About My Right To Choose To Not Have A Choice?". The featured video, "Republicans, Get In My Vagina," features Kate Beckinsale, Judy Greer, and Andrea Savage playing Republican women discussing their desire to have the government deep down in their vaginas making decisions about birth control, abortion, etc. It is, frankly, hilarious, but it also reminded me about a caller on Stephanie Miller's show yesterday morning.

The caller was talking about North Carolina's discriminatory Amendment 1 (articles on CBS and NYT), which would limit legally recognized couples to those who are heterosexual and married only. While this is obviously a push by the government of North Carolina to ban gay marriage under the law, it also has consequences for heterosexual couples who choose not to get married or who decide to enter into a civil partnership. The caller pointed this out and continued on to say that this kind of intrusive law is being pushed by the same party that keeps calling for smaller government.

The problem that I have with the Tea Party and other uber-conservative groups (okay, one of the many problems I have with them) is that they rail against the Democrats for attempting to push things like health care and economic growth on the American public and then they turn around and try to shove their own morals down America's throat at the federal, state, and local levels.

For example, Michelle Obama's Let's Move initiative was hammered by Republicans as an attempt by the government to control our diets and our waistlines. Right-wing bloggers, radio personalities, and pundits said all sorts of horrible things about her and basically came out in support of fat kids, diabetes, and heart disease, all because, they claimed, government had no right to try and help America stop being the land of the muffin top and the beer belly. Yet, if you listen to what conservatives are pushing--gay marriage should be illegal, abortion should be illegal, etc. (ad nauseum)--there is a huge disconnect between what they say about "big government" and what they think the government should be doing.

Now, obviously I'm a little biased about some things. I'm a woman. I'm bisexual. I'm pro-choice. I'm a liberal. I'm not going to deny that my support of same-sex marriage, rights for women, or anything else for that matter isn't tainted by my desire to have my government support freedoms that benefit me. But I'm also willing to admit that I don't mind having the government regulate things. Conservatives who bash Obama and the rest of the Democratic party for allegedly creating a big government aren't willing to admit that they want big government, too. Anyone who says that they're against the government getting into their business and then turns around and says they think that there should be an amendment passed stating that marriage is only between a man and a woman is a hypocrite and full of shit.

What's really striking to me is this: my support of gay marriage benefits the LGBT community, myself included; a conservative supporting a ban on gay marriage is benefiting no one. Similarly, my desire to have the right to choose whether or not I want to have an abortion affects only myself (and the father of the child); a conservative attempting to take away a woman's right to choose won't be affected either way. What I'm trying to say is that it really makes no sense to me why conservatives care so much. They can go on and on about what the Bible says or the sanctity of marriage or the right of every unborn child to grow up in a nation where once they pop out of the womb they're forgotten by the same people who wanted them to be born in the first place (okay, I'm editorializing a little there). In the end, there is nothing to support conservatives' claims that abortion, gay marriage, or any other issue they don't agree with is personally affecting them.

No one's heterosexual marriage has dissolved simply because the gay couple next door tied the knot. No one's children have been harmed by their sister's decision to have an abortion. People are, however, harmed by lack of health care, unemployment, and health problems stemming from obesity (which are exacerbated by their lack of health care). Clearly, the Democrats are pushing an agenda that has an eye toward improving quality of life for all Americans; the Republicans are pushing an agenda that has an eye toward controlling the personal lives of people they don't even know.

"Republicans, Get In My Vagina" is a satirical look at women's reactions to conservative laws and initiatives that attempt to control one aspect of their lives. It could just as easily have been called "Republicans, Get In My Marriage" or "Republicans, Get All Up In My Biz-natch." Regardless of what conservatives are for or against, their treatment of women, minorities, and the poor have alienated them and lost them the support of key constituencies they need if they expect to win any election, let alone the presidency. PoliticsUSA and The American Prospect, among others, have reported that women are leaving the GOP because they are fed up with policies that are designed specifically to control them and limit their choices (which could also be synonymous with "freedoms").

The GOP denies that it is waging a "war on women," even going so far as to ask some Republican congresswomen to throw themselves under the bus by claiming that conservatives aren't trying to pass laws that limit women's rights and that it's President Obama and his health care plan that are the real menace. Yet, Soraya Chemaly had absolutely no problem finding evidence of GOP animosity towards women when she wrote a piece for the Huffington Post aptly entitled "10 Reasons the Rest of the World Thinks the U.S. Is Nuts." Thankfully, it's not just the rest of the world who thinks that; there are plenty of Americans who think that what's going on in today's political sphere is crazy.

While the 2012 presidential election is a big deal, it obviously doesn't matter in the long run as long as Republicans continue to keep their hold on state and local governments. In the almost four years that Obama has been president, conservatives have successfully blocked policies and laws brought to Congress by Democrats while passing measures at the state level that have sweeping implications for the rest of the country. It's almost as if the GOP is hoping that it can win the election so that it can make Mitt Romney the Wizard of Oz and continue its work as the man behind the curtain. The real way to successfully block the Republican agenda is by taking control of both houses of Congress and winning back gubernatorial seats that were lost in the 2010 "shellacking." Maybe the gender gap that is growing in the Republican party can help make that happen.

Oh, and one final note to Republicans: stay the hell away from my vagina. K, thanks.

-J

Monday, May 7, 2012

Go West, Young Man

Later this summer, an old friend of mine is moving to Portland, Oregon. He and I were best friends in high school and most of college, but drifted apart my senior/his junior year. Even still, we have remained acquaintances for the last few years as we both went to the same grad school and are even currently working for the same employer. We like to say that he and I have parallel lives; even when we don't plan to, we end up doing the same things. Which is why I'm both excited and dismayed that he's doing as Horace Greeley commanded--going west.

I'm excited for three reasons. One, he's starting a new chapter in his life and I wish him all the best. Two, if we do, in fact, have parallel lives, then I'll probably be moving out to the Pacific coast at some point in the next year or so. Three, he's doing what both of us had wanted to do for a while (separately, but ultimately similarly) and leaving the east coast behind. I'm dismayed for one very big reason: I'm jealous that he gets to do what I want to do and that I know I won't be able to do for a little while longer.

I'm not ashamed to admit that I can be overtaken by the green-eyed monster once in a while. I've been planning to move to Seattle for several years now, although Portland had recently begun to grab my attention shortly before my friend mentioned he was moving there. (It's actually kind of freaky the way that our minds work. We're convinced that we're supposed to one day avert some catastrophe so it's important that the universe keep us within a zip code or two of each other.) I'm not yet financially stable enough to move across the state, let alone across the country. So, yes, I'm a little jealous that he's getting to "live the dream" so to speak, while I'm still stuck in limbo Rochester.

He'll be living here:
Portland, Oregon (Wikimedia Commons)
And I'll be living here:
Rochester, New York (Wikimedia Commons)
It's sort of like one of those "Find the Differences" pictures that you used to get in Highlights magazine. Or, better yet, an ink blot test. In the first picture, I see beauty and clean air. In the second, I see cold weather and depression.

Don't get me wrong. There are a lot of reasons to love Rochester. But October through April just happen NOT to be seven of them. It's also that I've been here for far too long. Not just Rochester. New York in general. While I was born in Pennsylvania, I've spent most of my life in this state and about the only things it has going for it right now are a Democratic governor and the fact that it legalized gay marriage last year. I'm looking for a change and am going to have to wait at least one more year to find it.

So, yes, I'm happy for my friend. And, yes, I'm eventually getting the hell out of here. But that doesn't mean that I can't be a little bit sulky about it in the meantime.

-J

Friday, May 4, 2012

Black Hole: 1. Star: 0.

Sometimes I wonder why people tend to tune me out from time to time when I talk to them. Then I remember that it's because I find things like black holes interesting and I like to lecture talk about them.

This article from Discover Magazine caught my eye yesterday. It's the story of a wayward star whose orbit wandered too close to a black hole and became the stellar version of dinner. Let that be a lesson to you. Not sure what the lesson is, exactly, but I'm sure it's there somewhere.

I've always regretted not studying math and science harder in school. Part of it was that I had teachers who weren't all that great; part of it was that I wasn't really engaged in the material. I have a basic understanding of science in general and an above-average understanding of the earth sciences in particular, but I'm pretty sure that Koko the Gorilla has better math skills than I do. Alas, this means no ridiculously awesome career involving telescopes, lab coats, or watching black holes "eat."

 *le sigh*

-J

Thursday, May 3, 2012

"They Say It's Your Birthday!"

"It's my birthday, too, yeah!"

No, for real. It actually is my birthday today. I'm turning 26, which means I've just finished living for a quarter century. Today I'm going to have fun and ignore the fact that I've accomplished almost nothing of worth in the last two and a half decades. I mean, sure, I have a BA in history and I've done some really cool things. But then I look at the fact that George Custer, while a complete dick, was made a general at the age of 23 and I realize that I'm a complete disgrace to my age bracket.

General Custer (via Wikimedia Commons)
General George Custer. Not Pictured: The blogger's complete lack of badassery.

"I'm glad it's your birthday. Happy birthday to you!"

-J

Wednesday, May 2, 2012

A Prince Among Frogs; Or, How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Embrace Online Dating

In addition to being the one-year anniversary of the death of Osama Bin Laden, today is also my one-month anniversary. On the second of last month, I first went out to coffee with my now-boyfriend, Don.

I've never been much for celebrating anniversaries, honestly. In high school, my then-boyfriend (and, later, fiancé) once brought anniversary gifts into our bio class because it was the only time we really saw each other during the day. Now, this might seem bitchy or ungrateful, but I was absolutely mortified, especially because our teacher thought it was the sweetest thing ever and made a huge deal out of it. It was that I didn't appreciate the thought; I just didn't really like the attention and I felt that it was a bit unnecessary. I was glad when none of my other boyfriends and girlfriends got all squirrely about marking special occasions (and not just because I had a hard time remembering dates).

But today I actually feel like I have something to celebrate. Why? Because this is my first one-month anniversary in a really long time.

High school and college for me can be chronicled pretty well using my love life. Shortly after grad school started, however, I kind of hit a wall when it came to romance and sex. A very high, very hard two-year-long wall. Between St. Patrick's Day of 2010 and the day after St. Patrick's Day of 2012, absolutely nothing happened in my love life. No dates. No relationships. No sex. Nada. Zip. Nothing.

I'm not really sure to what I should attribute this horrifically long dry spell. I think it was mostly that the pool of potential partners in grad school was a lot smaller than it was when I was an undergrad. Regardless of the reason, it was really strange and (more than) a little depressing. I won't claim that I'm the female Casanova or anything, but before my life turned into a barren wasteland of singleness, four months seemed like a long time between relationships. (And by relationships, I really mean regular sexual partners. Relationships just sounds better.)

In 2011, things started to look up...or so I thought. I asked a guy I was interested in to go to coffee and he said yes. And then he agreed to go to dinner. And I started to believe that maybe, just maybe, the dry spell was over. "But wait," you're thinking, "didn't she just say she didn't have a date until 2012?" This is not a contradiction, ladies and gentlemen. What I assumed were two dates (Those do sound like dates, right? I'm not crazy or anything?) were actually not. Which I didn't find out until I tried to kiss him good night after our second "not-a-date." Turns out that he hadn't realized that by coffee and dinner--two mainstays of early dating rituals in Western culture--I meant coffee and dinner. He was literally convinced that I was just a nice person who wanted to be friends.

I think the words you're looking for right now are "Oy vey."

After that I sort of tried to convince myself that it didn't really matter. For a while I hadn't minded being single. It was nice not to have to worry about someone else or to deal with the drama that comes with a relationship. But by March of 2012, I was no longer able to keep up that charade. I was lonely and I was ready to date again. For real this time. But I knew that I wasn't likely to find a partner at my job and there aren't a lot of other places that I frequent enough. I don't like the bar scene and my friends aren't the kind (thankfully) to set someone up on a blind date. So, what was a poor single girl to do? What practically everyone has had to do from time to time: online dating.

I went into the online dating scene with trepidation. I had never had a very good opinion of it and was almost positive that nothing would come of it. After I had signed up and filled out my profile, I didn't expect to get any hits. I'm not completely unfortunate looking, but I'm also no raving beauty, so I figured it would be a cold day in hell before someone actually sent me a message. Boy, was I ever wrong. Unfortunately, most of the messages I got were either from complete scumbags or from really nice men and women who I genuinely had nothing in common with.

When I finally found someone I was compatible with and met with him for coffee, I was really excited. "This is it," I thought. "I'm finally dating again." We were seeing each other only for a few weeks before I started to think that maybe I should have just stayed single. Without getting into detail, this guy ended up being a complete asshole. The one thing that really made me angry was the fact that he assumed that I didn't feel attractive because of my weight and that it was completely okay for him to date me even though he didn't find me attractive. He would constantly make comments about it and even tried to convince me not to eat certain things. I'm sorry, but if I wanted someone to be my father, I'd have said that on the first date.

While things were fizzling out with Douchey McDoucherson, I met Don. We had been messaging back and forth for over a week before we finally agreed to meet up for coffee and I had pretty much decided by that point that I was willing to give this a go. We have a lot in common and got into a lot of interesting topics while sending long, detailed messages to each other. Within the first fifteen minutes of our first date, I was convinced that I either had to date this man or, at the very least, be his best friend. One month later and we're in the process of building a strong relationship based on friendship, intellect, trust, and mutual attraction.

So, while I don't usually get all gushy and romantic about anniversaries, this year is different. It isn't really only because this is the first relationship I've had since before the last midterm election. It's also because he and I fit well together. It's because I've found someone who is compatible in all the right ways and who makes me feel...whole. Even though it's only been a month, I'm starting to understand what people mean when they use the word "soulmate." I don't necessarily believe in the concept, but it's the only word I can use to describe what he means to me.

Even with the bad experiences I had with online dating, it (as well as the two-year gap in my love life) was worth it. Don's the kind of person that I'd want to be friends with even if things didn't work out romantically. Finding someone like that made the effort of wading through a sea of frogs seem not so bad after all. I've changed my tune a bit about using dating sites, although I'm still not completely impressed with them. And who knows? Maybe this will end up as one of those success stories that are always shoved down your throat in an effort to get you to join dating sites. Regardless, I've gotten my groove back and I've found a prince.

"And that," as Robert Frost said, "has made all the difference."

-J

Tuesday, May 1, 2012

1,001 Days of Change

I think that everyone can agree that the first post on a new blog is not only the hardest to write, but also the least fun to read. This one will probably be no different.

My name is Jenee and I'm a 25-almost-26-year-old living in Rochester, NY. While Waking Up in the Real World is primarily going to be a personal blog, my reason for starting it was to have a way to chronicle my involvement in the Day Zero Project. This project challenges participants to complete a list of 101 goals in 1,001 days. My list of goals can be found here. As you'll see, item number 6 is "write a blog chronicling my Day Zero project." So, hey, there's one goal I can mark as being in progress. *cue applause*

I hate writing about myself, especially in that formulaic "this is who I am" kind of way. Instead, I like to let people get to know me by following my blog and reading what I have to say. I also know, however, that readers need a bit of context in order to decide whether or not they have any interest in following a blog, so I'll give you a brief overview:

I'm a liberal. I'm apathetic when it comes to religion (as in, I don't care whether or not there's a higher power). I'm bisexual and currently dating a wonderful man named Don that will probably feature heavily in my (mis)adventures. I'm highly opinionated about pretty much everything, most of which comes from reading books and articles on topics I'm interested in, but some of which comes from actual life experience. I'm a huge nerd, especially when it comes to science fiction television. I love to read. A lot. If I could get paid to read, I'd be the happiest woman on the planet.

So...that's a slice of myself, although there's obviously a lot more to me. At this point, I should also explain the title of the blog. I graduated college in 2009 and have been sort of floundering since then (including a misguided attempt at a Master's in Education program that I ended up hating). The main reason I wanted to do the Day Zero Project was because there were a lot of things in my life that I wanted to change, i.e., my financial situation, my weight, etc. I've tried to complete it a few times in the past but never really had the drive/willpower/what-have-you to actually do it. In the last few months I've come to realize that I was sort of allowing myself to keep hitting the "snooze button" on my life and had ended up stuck in a rut because of it. Therefore, I felt that it was time to wake up and do something about that. Hence, the Day Zero project and the name of my blog.

There! You've made it through my first post, which is always the worst. That has to mean it can only get better from here, right? :)

-J